Complications - miscarriage

Grief after Miscarriage

• Miscarriage is often sudden, and so you have had little chance to prepare
• Most parents (especially mothers) feel somehow responsible that their baby has died. They search the weeks of pregnancy trying to associate the death on something they may have done.
• Bereaved parents often find that their friends don't mention the baby, or stay away because they don't know what to say.
• Your pregnancy still feels a part of you – and there are feelings of loss that you may experience more intensely.

You may experience some signs of grief, including:

• loss of appetite
• problems with sleep (waking up multiple times, or very early, or difficult falling asleep)
• loss of energy
• sadness and teary spells
• lack of motivation to do things
• loss of enjoyment in things you used to enjoy

These feelings will gradually lessen, but the healing process takes time. If you are still struggling with these feelings 3 to 6 months later, discuss this with your health care provider. Some women find professional counseling is helpful in assisting them with the grief process.

Support for grieving families

• Acknowledge the pregnancy loss with friends and family. Once you tell someone, you will be surprised how many women you know have experienced an early pregnancy loss.
• Talk openly with your partner about any feelings of guilt you may have.
• Find support from others through pregnancy loss support groups
• Anticipate a resurfacing of grief around your due date. This is response is normal, this date has been in your mind in anticipation of what might have been.
• The decision to become pregnant again is very individual. Give consideration to the physical and emotional impact of any decision. Be sure to give yourself adequate time to grieve and come to terms with your loss.
• Ensure that you are physically ready to begin a new pregnancy. Your clinician will help you determine if you are physically ready to start a pregnancy.